Due to a seven year hiatus between pregnancies my frazzled mama brain completely forgot what it was like to have a post baby bod. I had forgotten about the extra skin, the stretch marks, the lack of tone. I forgot about the fact my hair would fall out in handfuls. That my breast would grow, deflate, grow, deflate with every feeding. I forgot that the lack of sleep would show on my face no matter how much makeup I put on to cover up that fact. I forgot it all.
So when I saw my wedding photographer, Tonya Espy, posted a call for boudoir models a small fire erupted deep within my soul. “I could do that” I thought to myself. So I submitted my story and selfie with my then 5 month old baby and went on with my day.
A few days later I received the email confirming I was one of the chosen models.
There were two theme options and I was lucky enough to snag the one I wanted. I have a bit of a vintage clothing addiction, especially when it comes to vintage nightgowns. Anything pretty and lacey is right up my alley. So wardrobe planning was an easy one and a part of the process that really got me excited about the shoot itself.
The day of the shoot I woke with excitement and a belly full of nerves. I’ve been in plenty of pictures in my life but this time was different. This was styled, thought out, and I was the ONLY subject. Not to mention I’d be doing all these photos wearing only lingerie…7 months after giving birth.
I. Was. Terrified.
Once I arrived the nerves went away immediately. Like I said, Tonya was our wedding photographer so we already knew each other and had a good relationship. The space was light and airy giving it a serene vibe that helped ease my mind further. Part of this shoot also involved complimentary hair and make up and SheTerra was amazing. Without having to ask she styled my hair and applied my makeup in a way I would of done (poorly lol) myself. She did an amazing job and was one of the sweetest people I’ve met. For a good hour I was able to sit, sip champagne and just chat with these two talented ladies and had a wonderful time.
The shoot it’s self was great! Tonya gives great direction and has a way about her that makes you feel at home, comfortable, and safe. We had a lot of fun with the poses, using the space, chasing the light, and having some good “girl talk”. I never thought once about what I was wearing, or lack there of, and felt super empowered and comfortable. I was actually bummed when the shoot was over because of how great I was feeling. I walked out of there feeling like a million bucks and giddy with excitement over what was just done.
Later that evening Tonya posted some previews and I was a bit shocked at how beautiful they turned out. As someone who had been avoiding my naked form in mirrors for months this was a huge eye opener. I looked fine. Great even. And should be proud of that fact because I had just given birth 7 months prior. I had been beating myself up over nothing, and trying to conform into a world that still doesn’t think the body I have is a beautiful one. With that said, screw norms, and screw what people THINK my body should look like. I’m healthy, my baby is healthy and above all else, I’m happy.
So ladies, if you’ve ever thought about doing a boudoir shoot stop thinking and just do it. Don’t wait till your body is “perfect”, flaunt what your mama gave you. Embrace you, because it’s beautiful. And if your in the Dayton area, call upon Mrs. Tonya Espy, you won’t be disappointed!
Until next time…